The Onion
There Are People In World Who Are Concerned About Current State Of Hip-Hop
- Title
- There Are People In World Who Are Concerned About Current State Of Hip-Hop
- Runtime
- 1:46
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- For More Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
A report published Friday by a team of sociologists has confirmed there are apparently people living in the world today who are deeply concerned about the current state of hip-hop and who continually express genuine worry over the musical genre's future.
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- The Onion's Future News From The Year 2137
- Runtime
- 10:37
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- For More Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
While other media outlets bring you news as it happens, only the Onion News Network has the power to bring you the news before it happens. In the year 2137 a catastrophe has reduced the world to a lawless wasteland — food and water are scarce, social institutions have crumbled, and a screaming, tattooed thug has been installed as the president of what remains of the United States.
For Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Cutest Guy In Whole Office Not Even Particularly Attractive
- Runtime
- 1:18
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
After over seven years of weekly meetings with his psychiatrist, 35-year-old Chris Vaughan told reporters Friday he is thrilled to be just two 45-minute sessions away from completely resolving all of his problems.
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Brad Pitt Decides To Grow Out Forehead Hair
- Runtime
- 3:06
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- For More Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
Leading social media site HarvardConnection is now valued at $400 billion, a couple is making out like its fucking Paris, and a freezing coatless woman has decided it's spring. It's the week of April 12, 2013.
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Excited Man Only Two Therapy Sessions Away From Resolving Issues
- Runtime
- 1:13
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- For More Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
After over seven years of weekly meetings with his psychiatrist, 35-year-old Chris Vaughan told reporters Friday he is thrilled to be just two 45-minute sessions away from completely resolving all of his problems.
For More Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Couple Making Out At Bus Stop Like It's Fucking Paris
- Runtime
- 1:22
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
According to locals waiting for the westbound number 66 shuttle at Chicago Avenue and Racine Avenue, a young man and woman seated on a bench at the bus stop are currently making out like it's fucking Paris or something.
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Report: Saxophone Still An Okay Vehicle For Self-Expression
- Runtime
- 1:14
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- For More Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
While declaring that the musical instrument was by no means ideally suited to the task, a report released by the National Endowment for the Arts Thursday concluded that the saxophone nevertheless remains a fairly decent vehicle for expressing one's unique personality and subjective emotional experience.
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- VIRAL VIDEO: High School Sophomore Sinks Incredible, Unnecessary Half-Court Shot
- Runtime
- 2:42
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- For More Today Now: http://onion.com/11SqwuB
Ryan Jurgens rode the bench most of the season, but when his coach gave him a chance, it really paid off!
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Businessman Does His Work Lying On Bed Like Schoolgirl
- Runtime
- 2:43
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- For More Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
An aquarium unveils its new 'Floating Carcasses of the Pacific' exhibit, a guy with 10,000 tweets and 15 followers is about ready to hang it up, and a local father buys string cheese to make coming to his house more fun. It's the week of March 29, 2013.
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Ashamed Student Affairs Committee Reveals There Aren't Any Awesome Events This Weekend
- Runtime
- 1:08
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- For More Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
Expressing shame and remorse in an email to the students of Hamilton College on Friday, disgraced student affairs coordinator Jessica Li, 20, regretfully informed undergraduates that there would be no cool events occurring on campus this weekend.
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Guy With 10,000 Tweets, 15 Followers About Ready To Hang It Up
- Runtime
- 1:24
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Saying that he's probably done all he could possibly do at this point, Twitter user Aaron Gartner confirmed Tuesday that after posting 10,000 tweets and accumulating just 15 followers, the 26-year-old is pretty much ready to pack it in and discontinue his account.
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Jessica Simpson Goes On Nationwide Book Tour To Promote The Novel She Read
- Runtime
- 1:04
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- For Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
The pregnant starlet has finished reading her long-awaited first book and is currently traveling the country to promote the John Grisham thriller to her fans.
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Physicists Confirm They Have Found And Killed The 'God Particle'
- Runtime
- 0:36
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
CERN researchers confirm that they have finally identified the elusive Higgs Boson particle and destroyed it forever.
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Onion News Empire Official Trailer
- Runtime
- 0:56
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- Watch Onion News Empire, Episode 1 now: http://amzn.to/11KlVvn
- Title
- How One Hot New Device Helps Couples Drag Out Their Doomed Relationship That Extra Month Or Two
- Runtime
- 3:00
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- For A Brand New Episode Of Today Now: http://onion.com/12q6IAO
The amazing new "Relationship Pro" video game controller lets both members of a couple pretend they are in a healthy relationship.
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Area Woman Thinks All Of Her Friends Should Be Comedians
- Runtime
- 1:25
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- For More More Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
According to statements made this week by office manager Caitlin Mooney, 26, her friends are all so funny that they should be comedians.
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Man With Strong Brand Loyalty Willing To Kill For Mazda
- Runtime
- 1:16
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- For More Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
In a stern warning aimed at critics of Mazdas everywhere, area man Matthew Hunker, a longtime Mazda driver with two Mazdas in his garage at home, said Thursday his loyalty to the car manufacturer was so strong that he would be willing to kill in its name.
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Popular Children's Book Author Reveals The 'Spooky Truth' About Creepy Conspiracy Theories
- Runtime
- 4:19
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- For A Brand New Episode Of Today Now: http://onion.com/ZPmTSZ
The bestselling author of "The Spooky Truth" series wants to teach kids that pulling back the curtain on what the government doesn't want us to know can be fun!
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Ten Years Later, Cheney Haunted By People He Didn't Manage To Kill In Iraq War
- Runtime
- 0:44
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- For More Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
In a rare, candid interview, former Vice President Dick Cheney admitted he regrets that he couldn't produce more casualties in the decade-long conflict.
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Authorities On Alert As Hundreds Of Crazed Sociopaths Enter Congressional Chambers
- Runtime
- 1:22
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- For More Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
Federal, state, and local law enforcement officials are reportedly on high alert today after a group of dangerous sociopaths entered the chambers of Congress, posing what sources are calling "an extreme risk" to the U.S. federal government and the nation at large.
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Proud Time To Be A Cowering Sack Of Shit As Democrats Back Off Assault Weapons Ban
- Runtime
- 2:45
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- For More Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Paul Ryan's Unsettling Budget Plan Reveals He Cuts His Own Hair
- Runtime
- 0:53
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- For More Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
Congressman Ryan is defending his extreme budget plan, which includes proposals that Americans make their own toothpaste and cut their own hair, just like he does.
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Cardinals Elect New Crisis Management Director
- Runtime
- 2:20
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- For More Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
The word 'innovate' is said over 24 million times at SXSW, NASA designers release a flirty new spaceskirt, and the next episode of 'Girls' to feature Lena Dunham shitting herself during gyno exam while eating a burrito.
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Finance Expert Saves Struggling Zoo By Firing All Employees, Getting Rid Of Cages
- Runtime
- 2:57
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- For A Brand New Episode Of Today Now: http://onion.com/Y0nwto
On Today NOW!, the savvy businessman who turned a zoo on the verge of bankruptcy into a money-making machine shares management tips with Jim and Tracy.
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Company Immediately Calls Job Applicant Upon Seeing 'B.A. In Communications' On Résumé
- Runtime
- 1:45
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- For More Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
Calling his résumé "exceptional" and "like nothing we've ever seen," the human resources department at local public relations firm Brink & Tiller called 22-year-old job applicant Corey Wilhelm immediately after noticing he had a Bachelor of Arts degree in Communications, sources confirmed Wednesday.
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Today NOW! Hosts Shake 7UP TEN Cans, Guarantee Explosive New Episode
- Runtime
- 0:24
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- For The Latest Today NOW!: http://onion.com/Yi52YW
Watch an all new episode of Today NOW! this Thursday exclusively at theonion.com.
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Pope Francis Resigns
- Runtime
- 0:46
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
An emotional, wistful Pope Francis I made a surprise announcement today that he will be resigning from the papacy at the end of the month.
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- James Holmes' Arraignment Delayed As Court Struggles To Remember Which Mass Shooter He Is
- Runtime
- 1:09
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- For More Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
Court officials complain that it's too difficult to keep track of every massacre and that recalling one from all the way back in July of 2012 is almost impossible.
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Nation Agrees Justin Bieber's Inevitable Meltdown Could Be Interesting To Watch
- Runtime
- 2:22
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- For More Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
Cancer topples Chavez in a bloodless coup, a poll finds that 99% of human beings would prefer big, slobbery hound dog pope, and Andrea Bocelli is smelling the shit out of a red rose. It's the week of March 8, 2013.
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- The Gunman Tragedy: A Recap Of The Onion's Coverage
- Runtime
- 1:20
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- For More Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
When tragedy struck Kansas City today, Onion reporters were first on the scene. This is a video recap of our coverage of the Gunman story that began this morning when she killed zero in a crowded mall.
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Shady New Wendy's Deal Offering Five Hamburgers For Free, No Questions Asked
- Runtime
- 0:57
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
The fast-food chain has rolled out a suspicious new promotion selling five hamburgers for zero dollars.
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Is This 'Real Life Mr. Ed' Just A Horse Owned By A Lunatic?
- Runtime
- 3:14
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- For A Brand New Episode Of Today Now: http://onion.com/Y0nwto
Tracy spends some time on a local farm with Ray Kimball, who insists that his horse Franklin has the incredible ability to talk!
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Man Not Sure He's Dynamic Enough To Work At Local Marketing Firm
- Runtime
- 1:11
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- For More Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
An online listing for a job at area marketing firm BizKo Solutions has left local man Ryan Urlich unsure whether he is truly dynamic enough to qualify for the position, sources confirmed Wednesday.
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Obama Issues Presidential Pardon To Get Biden Out Of Jail For Third Time This Year
- Runtime
- 1:16
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
The President was forced to exercise his clemency powers to free Joe Biden last week after the Vice President called the White House at 3 AM from a prison pay phone.
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Romney Blames Loss On Successfully Communicating His Message To Minorities
- Runtime
- 0:56
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- For More Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
In his first televised interview since the election, Mitt Romney said his bid for the White House was doomed by his ability to effectively and honestly convey his opinions to minority voters.
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Retiring Pope Half-Heartedly Suggests Grabbing Lunch Sometime With God
- Runtime
- 2:27
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- A report finds Chinese third-graders are falling behind U.S. high school students in math and science, a nostalgic warden has seen 3 generations of a family come through prison, and a battle of wits with an unwieldly burrito nears its thrilling endgame. It's the week of March 1, 2013.
For Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Netflix Checks If Area Man Okay After Watching 'Sons Of Anarchy' Season In Single Sitting
- Runtime
- 1:13
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Video-streaming service Netflix reportedly checked in on local customer Shane Fowler late Tuesday after a marathon viewing session in which the 31-year-old watched the entire third season of the TV series Sons Of Anarchy in one sitting.
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Nostalgic Warden Has Seen 3 Generations Of Family Come Through Prison
- Runtime
- 1:27
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- Casting a sentimental eye over his long career at the California Institution for Men, prison warden Kenneth Luger, 65, told reporters Thursday he will always remember the three generations of the Mowatt family he has seen pass through the corrections facility.
For Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Winter Storm Rocky Expected To Hit Kevin Hodges Of Joliet, IL Hardest After The Year He's Had
- Runtime
- 1:21
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Meteorologists say the blizzard pummeling the Midwest is expected to devastate Illinois resident Kevin Hodges given everything he's been going through lately.
For Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Amazing Dance Prodigy Hopes New Ballet Will Inspire Her Dad To Notice Her For Once
- Runtime
- 3:04
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Jim and Tracy meet the incredible ballet prodigy who choreographed an entire desperate plea for her father's attention all on her own.
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- God Airs History Of Workplace Tension With Pope Benedict XVI
- Runtime
- 0:32
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- The Divine Creator of All Things addressed a throng of dedicated fans on his troubled working relationship with the former Pope.
For Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Transportation Secretary LaHood Hoarding Traffic Cones, Stop Signs In Advance Of Looming Sequester
- Runtime
- 0:57
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- Transportation Secretary Ray LaHood is being proactive in the face of his department's potential budget cuts by scouring the country for road signs, traffic lights, and other unattended resources before Friday's sequester hits.
For Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Bob Dylan Lays Off 2,000 Workers From Songwriting Factory
- Runtime
- 1:55
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- Seeking to revitalize his musical operations following years of declining revenue and mounting production costs, musician Bob Dylan laid off 2,000 workers from his flagship songwriting factory in Muscatine, IA this week, sources confirmed.
For Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Somber Red Carpet Moment As 'In Memoriam' Coffins Wheeled Into The Auditorium
- Runtime
- 0:36
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- Stars and fans pay their respects as the corpses of celebrities we lost in 2012 are carried into the Dolby Theater for the Oscars.
For Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- NRA: 'It's Probably Best If You Just Ignore What We're About To Say'
- Runtime
- 2:31
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- An area man panics after accidentally 'liking' 381 of his ex-girlfriend's Facebook photos, Bob Dylan lays off 2,000 workers from a songwriting factory, and a group of cardinals host a going away party at the pope's favorite Vatican City bar. It's the week of February 22, 2013.
For Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Johnny Depp Now Completely Made Of Scarves And Bracelets
- Runtime
- 0:50
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
New photos show that the aging heartthrob has transitioned gracefully into a handsome mass of fabric and ornate bangles.
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Kathryn Bigelow Stuns On Red Carpet Wearing Blood-Soaked Rags Osama Bin Laden Was Killed In
- Runtime
- 1:36
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- The red carpet has never been hotter! Our fashion experts pick out their favorite looks, including Ben Affleck wrapped in a stylish George Clooney.
For Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Area Man Panics After Accidentally 'Liking' 381 Of His Ex-Girlfriend's Facebook Photos
- Runtime
- 1:11
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- As he browsed the social networking site Facebook last night, local man Aaron Neutzling, 24, reportedly panicked after realizing that in the course of the evening he had somehow "liked" nearly 400 of his ex-girlfriend's photos.
For Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Republicans Reach Out To Women With New 'No Punch Pretty Lady' Bill
- Runtime
- 1:09
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- To shore up support among female voters, the GOP has introduced a bill banning "putting angry hands to lady necks" and "hurting pretty ladies with mean sex."
For Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
- Title
- Burger King Twitter Hack Forces Its Followers To Survive Without Stream Of BK Information
- Runtime
- 0:48
- Date posted
- 14 years ago
- Description
- Following a cyber attack to the fast-food chain's Twitter account, the thousands of people who had chosen to follow Burger King were left without access to important information about the restaurant's products and promotions.
For Breaking News: http://www.theonion.com/video
Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA
Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion
Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/theonion
